April 29, 2008
Cause it is what it is! I wish I had been as comfortable with myself years ago as i am now. When I think of all the times I wasted in my youth trying to live up to other folks standard I could just…well, sumthin-none-other (u do the math…lol)!
Learning to accept who and what you are I think is one of the keys to success and happiness in life. Be thankful that God made the you that is you cause you were wondrously created I say.
Self acceptance is being loving and happy with who you are NOW. Some call it self-esteem, others self-love, but whatever you call it, you’ll know when your accepting yourself cause it feels great! Its an agreement with yourself to appreciate, validate, accept and support who you are at this very moment, even those parts youâ€™d like to eventually change. I looked at myself in the mirror this morning after my shower and I refused to throw up cause I am the Chuckster! This is important…even those parts you’d eventually like to change. Yes, you can accept (be okay with) those parts of yourself you want to change some day.
If acceptance feels so good and is so good for us, then why donâ€™t we accept ourselves? The answer I feel is motivation. We use our lack of acceptance (punishment – cause it feels bad) as motivation to get us to do, not do, be, and not be what we think we should.
Typically, I’ve found myself judging “me” very unfavorably with the hope it would motivate me to change. I hoped that if I felt bad enough about myself, that maybe that would motivate me to change. Did this work? Sometimes, but only short term. Most times all it caused me to feel worse which sapped the energy I could have used to make changes. It became a vicious cycle. It worked exactly counter to what I wanted to do.
â€œAcceptance allows change. The ‘acceptance mode’ includes everything, even my judgments. It allows me to be okay now, even before I reach my goals.â€
â€œWhen I began to accept myself the way I was [am] right at the moment in time, I started a new life with new possibilities that did not exist before because I was so caught up in the struggle against reality that it was all I could do.â€
Passengers for me, with more years behind me, than in front, it is what it is…
Do as I do, hug yourself, strut your stuff and get comfortable in the skin you are in…
All Aboard! The LiFeTrain!
â€œSome people find fault like there’s a reward for it.â€ – Zig Ziglar
April 28, 2008
I am so proud of myself. I now know that I am a real man and I can proudly carry my man manual with pride! Oh yeah babe…I watched the movie “The NOTEBOOK” last weekend and I kept a stone cold face! My allergies did act up at the end though!
On the real though, here’s my take. I hope before I die I am blessed by God to love and be loved by a woman such as was portrayed in this movie. The movie begins with an elderly gentleman named, Duke and an elderly lady in a nursing home. Duke reads to her a story about two young people in love, named Noah and Allie. We get to hear about how they met. We learn that they were separated by Allieâ€™s mother who didnâ€™t approve of Noahâ€™s financial class. Itâ€™s obvious that Duke has affection for this elderly lady. As the love story unfolds, you find out that Duke is really Noah and the elderly lady is Allie. The sad part is that Allie doesnâ€™t remember Noah because she has severe Alzheimerâ€™s disease.
After a seven year separation, Allie comes back to Noah. He promises her that he would love her forever, even though it may not be easy. Fighting is okay because love trumps turmoil. The doctors and Noahâ€™s children tell him that there is no hope for reaching Allie. Her disease is progressive and she will never know who he is. Noah never gave up; instead he lived at this nursing home to be near Allie and to read to her the story of their lives. You find out that the story was written by Allie with an inscription, â€œRead to me and Iâ€™ll come back to you.â€ His devotion to her and faith that she would come back to him moved me to tears. There was a very brief moment when she realized the story was about her and him before she had a terrible set back. The ending nearly did me in. They died together in their sleep.
This was a story of love that never gave up. This was a story of hope and faith in love that is eternal.
Love that lasts a lifetime is always a gripping story. It grips us if we donâ€™t have it and it grips us if we do. Iâ€™m blessed because in my heart of hearts I know I will find that kind of love, my faith is that strong. I know that Iâ€™m not alone because there are many of us out there who want to find their â€œNoahâ€ or “Allie”. To my fellow single passengers, may God grant you the desire of your heart….In Jesus Name…
And to my married fellow passengers…
Take note of this: CLICK
April 25, 2008
Kani have this dance?Â CLICK
April 24, 2008
The Chuckie Show – 7 – Date Night! – (05/11/07) CLICK ON THE RIGHT ARROW TO LISTEN…
(Right-Click on the Link Above and Save)
CLICK ON THE RIGHT > Arrow to LISTEN
Date Night with Chuckie!
After last weekend’s date I am glad we agreed, simplicity is the order for tonight. You look real cute in those jeans, and I see you wore your OHIO STATE University Sweatshirt just for me! As we knife through the night in the C Mobile one of my favorite songs comes over the XM.
A quick bite and off to a simple yet favorite spot of mine — The Bookstore. You go your way; I go mine as we head off to separate interests. Later I spot you in a little secluded nook in the store. I walk up to you and pretend I don’t you…”Sup Gurl”? You say, “Hey Big Daddy”, How you be handsome. Of course you know that Stupid Chuckie grin materializes as I groove over how spontaneous you can be. UH OH, my girl Jill Scott comes over the background music sound system…Livin life like it’s Golden!…Right on key we both peek around the corner, no one looking…we break out in dance…WORK IT GURL! COME TO PAPA…OH YEAH, WE LIVING LIFE LIKE IT’S GOLDEN! We get so caught up we didn’t notice the older couple (At Least 70ish) pass by and next thing you know they got it going on also! We all fall-out laughing!
AIN’T NO SHAME…IN OUR GAME!
We notice something going on in the cafe part of the store so we head over to grab a table. As we order a couple of espressos A guitarist finishes up.
We find a table just as a sharp looking couple take center court. It appears they are going to spit some spoken word.
Let’s listen in:The Sister goes first…Do you qualify to be the man I need you to be? Will you be able to recognize the things you need to see? Will you be able to understand, that I’m a good woman and in my life I need a good man? Do you qualify?Do you qualify to fertilize my unproduced seeds?Can you fulfill, as I can, all of our needs? Can you put me in my place if you see I am slippin’? Can you talk to me, wholeheartedly? Not constantly trippin??Do you qualify?Do you qualify to be called all mine? Can you leave the other women and temptations behind? Can you come to me with your problems and not wait until it’s too late? Can you stand up and admit if you made a mistake? Do you qualify? Do you qualify to be the honest ebony man I would want you to be? Would you be able to look me in my eyes and admit your feelings to me? Could you take me in your arms and make love to me all night long? Can you be sensitive and still be strong?Do you qualify?Do you qualify to be my friend as well as my lover? Can you put our love before any other? Can you cherish me as if I were Diamonds & Gold? Can you make me feel like I’m the last woman you’ll ever hold?Do you qualify? Do you qualify to be called a good man? If I have doubts can you reassure me and understand? Can your love intoxicate me as if I were High? To be in my life, I need to know,DO YOU QUALIFY?
As the Brother takes the mic, you look at me, your eyes saying “WELL?”
The Brother begins…
“You ask, do I qualify. Can I fulfill your needs and become the man you need me to be? My sister, are you prepared for what you’ve asked for? Can you handle the responsibility? Can you accept that, by GOD, I am the chosen one, the authority, the comforter, and the head? Will you submit and willingly follow my path? Or will you fight with me instead? If I am your King, will you treat me as such? Will I get the best of your beauty and poise? Or will I be subjected to an appearance neglected, and checked with some serious noise? When I talk, will you listen? I mean whole heartedly and feel me? Or will you rush me just to make your point too? Can I be the man at all times?even when it hurts? Or is it just when it’s convenient for you? Can you love me for me, and not who you wish I could be? Will you see the strong Black Man within? Or will you always remind me of the all the past brothers behind me and make me pay for their sins? If I don’t send you flowers the day your co-worker received some, will you know that I love you still? Or will my good name be uttered along with those other doggish brothers? Will you question if my commitment is real? Will you be patient and teach me to understand you, and allow my knowledge of your needs to grow? Or will you shut me out when I ask, Baby what’s wrong? Or will you respond with, “Well a REAL man would know!” When we first met, what was it that caught your eye? Was it my mind, my heart, my personality? Or was it my suit, or my job, or do you love what I drive, instead of what’s driving me? Yes I can, and I will, make love to you from midnight to the dawning of the sun. But, if I tell you I’m tired, will you trust I’m sincere or believe that there must be another one? My sister, I love you and my heart can be yours. No woman could lead me astray. But like you, I have needs, so I beg of you, please, in this love thang meet me half way. In life’s tough times I’ll hold you, in the rough times I’ll mold you; your simplest wish will be my command. My life is yours if need be. Yes you can fully bleed me, and when hell comes, in your place, I’ll stand. A good relationship is a powerful institution that must be built on a foundation of two. So to answer your question, YES sister, I do qualify. Now, more importantly…do you? You touch my hand…we look at each other intently; we make love with our clothes on. Just sitting there… saying nothing…the eyes…they never lie.
See ya next week…Date night with Chuckie….
April 23, 2008
Hey Passengers, I’ve been thinking…uh “O”…he’s been thinking! RUN!!! Anyway, based on some recent conversations I’ve had with some of our fellow passengers, I’ve concluded that when we are not aware of the circumstances that dictate our lives, we become blind to lifeâ€™s defining moments. Have you ever though that emotional intelligence offers a way out? Let me explain what I am chewing on. Because it (emotional intelligence) is made up of four core skills we all have access to, I think we should just simply get back to practicing them. Self-awareness is the most important of them. Applying emotional intelligence to the task of balancing our careers and life means knowing what, when, why, and how emotions affect our well-being here on the train, and how we manage these emotions could possibly help us live a healthier more successful life. I know, I know, it may sound simple at a glance, but only the skilled person can do this â€œin the momentâ€, when different kinds of emotions get a hold of us. I must admit, I am not quite there yet, but I think I am on to something.
For a long time I was not aware of how work affected my whole life. I was so focused on work (and saving a marriage that was doomed) that I forgot to take a moment each day to reflect on how my drive, motivation and emotions were either helping or hindering my well-being and the well-being of those around me. I realize as I hope you will that it is time for me to take a hard look at how to get myself back â€“ how to get energized, get ample rest, and nourishment to not only survive, but thrive.
So I say to you in closing…Take time today to reflect…Take time to smell the roses…Take…a joyful breath.
All Aboard…The LiFeTrain.
April 21, 2008
Good morning, afternoon or evening depending of what station you hoped the train today (Morning, afternoon or evening station ). Either way, let me say to you,
This week, greet life with enthusiasm and confidence by constantly maintaining the awareness of how cherished my fellow passengers who hop the train are to me!
Ok Chuckie, What was that all about?
Well, My class reunion is coming up in August and I am determined to get back to my Football Lean, Mean Grid-iron Machine by then. So, I am turning up the workout efforts! Back to power walking, step class, Kick boxing and spin cycling. I may not be a Chippendale Dancerby then…but at a minimum I do plan to be a “Chippen-Whale of a “HOT” type guy! Plan to make them regret not making me the Senior Prom King!Â Well, I was team captain so, guess you can’t win them all…
I LOVE A CHALLENGE! Something to get me motivated! I’m HYPED!
.…By the way, #78, THE WILD MAN!…with the full extension fro baby! …..wish I could a strad or two of those locks back now. Maybe I’ll go for the bald (sexy?) look…? What say you…What’s the skinny on bald men ladies?
By the way, I am doing the reunion website…Lemme know if you are interested in seeing it.
No Diet! Bad word, not good. What I advise you to do along with me is just get moving, and moving and moving! I guarantee you, if you get started with me (you can start Tuesday since I just sprung this on you) you won’t have to worry about a diet, the movement “WILL” casue a decrease gradually in your caloric intake. So please, Jurn may (that’s souther for Join me, remember I spent some time down south recently). We’re sure to be “Turd” (southern for tired, ok I’ll stop) but in the end, it’ll be worth it. R U wit me?
I had a thought! won’t you join me? I am issuing another one of those Chuckie’s Challenges. It’s our life, we are responsible for the results. It’s time to turn up the heat. I’ll post my progress, solicit encouragement from you and of course I will cheer you on to your walk down the beach this August in your THONG bikini, uh no Guys (Men folk) I meant the ladies…we’ll just shoot to be able to take that stroll without a shirt…ok?
Aint gon hurt us to get on down (Lbs): CLICK
I hope they play some of these at the reunion so I can do “The Chuckie Dance!” Maybe I’ll post a youtube of me doing the “CHUCKIE!”
…should eye?…nah…the world ain’t ready for “The Chuckie!”
This will be our mantra for this project:
Perseverance is not a long race: it is many short races, one after another. — Walter Elliot
So if you’ve been putting off the great sweat thang…Join an old man!
Merry Monday Guys!
All Aboard, The LiFeTrain!
April 18, 2008
One of my favorite authors said:
Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.
Hey Passengers, this weekend…do you…have a great weekend!
All Aboard…The LiFeTrain
April 17, 2008
Poverty is not being without money, but being without hope…
It is not the cards you are dealt but what you do with them that counts…
April 16, 2008
Hey passengers, please pause today at noon to pray to the father in the name of his son.Â Just a quick nod to heaven if nothing else…Thanks!