February 29, 2008

Madam was 1st, then came Oprah…

Category: Thoughts — chuckie @ 12:58 am

Hey passengers here’s a very beautiful woman, Madam C.J. Walker. She was quite the business woman. I’m giving you a little background here, but if you get the chance, pick up this book. it’s well worth the read!

Her third husband, Charles Joseph Walker and her daughter Lelia had key roles in the growth and day-to-day operations of the business. In September, 1906 Madam Walker and her husband toured the country promoting their products and training sales agents while Lelia ran a mail-order operation from Denver. From 1908 to 1910 they operated a beauty training school, the Lelia College for Walker Hair Culturists, in Pittsburgh. In 1910 they moved the central operations to Indianapolis, then the country’s largest manufacturing base, to utilize that city’s access to eight major railway systems. At this height of success, Madam Walker gathered a group of key principals to run the company, and she and her husband divorced.

She became an inspiration to many black women. Fully recognizing the power of her wealth and success she lectured to promote her business which in turn empowered other women in business. She gave lectures on black issues at conventions sponsored by powerful black institutions. She also encouraged black Americans to support the cause of World War I and worked to have black veterans granted full respect.

After the bloody East St. Louis Race Riot of 1917, Madam Walker devoted herself to having lynching made a federal crime. In 1918 she was the keynote speaker at many National Association for the Advancement of Colored People (NAACP) fund raisers for the anti-lynching effort throughout the Midwest and East. She was honored later that summer by the National Association of Colored Women (NACW) for making the largest contribution to saving the home of abolitionist Frederick Douglass. She donated large sums of money to the NAACP’s anti-lynching campaign and later in her life revised her will to support black schools, organizations, individuals, orphanages, retirement homes, as well as YWCAs and YMCAs.

Madam Walker’s home, Villa Lewaro, was built in August of 1918 on Irvington-on-Hudson, New York. Her neighbors included industrialists Jay Gould and John D. Rockefeller. The grand estate served not only as her home but as a conference center for summits of race leaders to discuss current issues.

Madam Walker died at Villa Lewaro at the age of 51 on Sunday, May 25, 1919 from complications of hypertension. Upon her death she was considered to be the wealthiest African-American woman in America and known to be the first African-American woman millionaire. Some sources cite her as the first self-made American woman millionaire. Her daughter Lelia succeeded her as president of the C. J. Walker Manufacturing Company.

Have a great weekend guys!

All Aboard, “The LiFeTrain!”

February 27, 2008

Dealing With Grown Folks…Part III

Category: Thoughts — chuckie @ 12:20 am

Ok…are we beating a dead horse or what? Just a little leavity here…I really do think this is an important subject. So did my friend Sharon, the cute little Georgetown Hoya Alumnist. But…I’ll forgive her, for someday I know…she will sob into her tissue screaming THE OHIO STATE UNIVERSITY!

Anyway, her comments go hand in hand with my post for today…her words:

You’re right – it is easier to deal with that type person when their behavior is the norm rather than reserved just for you! I’ve had the opportunity to work with someone who fits this category for 7 years now! I say opportunity rather than misfortune because that’s what it’s been for me. Having to professionally interact with this co-worker has helped me to grow immensely. I’ve actually taken the time to try and understand what makes this person tick and to acknowledge that the person is just generally unhappy with their life. I realize there’s nothing I can do about that and I don’t waste any energy trying to change the person. One thing I’ve learned to be true is that “if they knew better they’d do better!” So, my suggestion is to not let difficult people bring you down to their level but rather maintain your professionalism, document your interactions in writing if you need to and keep on steppin’!!

Well, great minds, and a certain train scoundrel who has been surprisingly quiet this week back there in the caboose, think alike. I say today:

I try to start out by examining myself. I say “Chuckie”…..”Huh?” (ok I’m talking to myself here, don’t call the guys with the neat jacket that ties in the back) “Chuckie my boy I say” “are you sure that the other person is really the problem and that you’re not overreacting?” Am I experiencing difficulty with the same type of person or actions? Does a pattern exist for me in my interaction with coworkers? Do I recognize that I have hot buttons that are easily pushed? (We all do, you know.) So perhaps you can do today as I do… start with self-examination to determine that the object of our attention really is a difficult person’s actions.

Ok guys, help me here…Let’s brainstorm ways to address the situation. When we think we are the object of an attack, or others appear to support the dysfunctional actions of a coworker, is it difficult to objectively assess our options?

Just a little food for discussion here on “The LiFeTrain”.

All Aboard! The LiFeTrain!”

February 26, 2008

Dealing With Grown Folks…Part II

Category: Thoughts — chuckie @ 5:38 am

Well guys yesterday we started this series out with defining [MY] feelings on dealing with difficult people. I hope this is helpful as I am sure we all cross paths at one point or another with someone who’s Myers Briggs might not gel with our own (am I politically correct or what!) dichotomy.

Today passengers we look at: Why You Must Deal With Difficult People

Trust me. Your situation won’t get better; left unaddressed, it usually gets worse. Unaddressed, necessary conflict simmers just below – and often erupts counter productively above – the surface at work. I am dealing with self-control issues as a result of not directly addressing conflict. Kinda like the balloon that if continually blown with air “POP!” .

So I decided to have an extended mirror moment this week and share my thoughts and conclusions. …oops, a rabbit trail…back on point…

I have researched that initially, people go into shock when they are treated unprofessionally, so if we were to take some time to understand exactly what is happening to us, I’ll bet we would see that are not alone. Once we are fully aware of what is happening, deciding to live with the situation long term is not an option. We become so angry and feel so much pain that our efforts to address the situation could become irrational. Trust me on this one I know…It’s far better to address the difficult person while you can maintain some objectivity and emotional control. Again, before we “POP!”.

Constant complaining about our coworker or the situation could very quickly earn us the title of whiner or complainer. Managers wonder why we are unable to solve our own problems.
Now, let’s talk worse Case Scenario If You Fail to Deal With Difficult People. Most importantly, if we were to become embroiled in a constant conflict at work, we might not only get blamed for being “unable to handle the situation like a mature professional,” But we might be labeled as a “difficult” person, too. This label is hard to escape and can have devastating consequences for our careers.

Finally, if the situation were to continue to deteriorate over time, the organization and our boss might tire of us. The boss might decide that we are a “high maintenance” employee, easily replaced with a more professional or cooperative person, and you could lose your job.

WHOA! I’ll stop for today. We’ll come back to the mirror tomorrow…I’m getting a little to deep even for myself. Anyway, see ya tomorrow? …LOL

All Aboard! The LiFeTrain!

February 25, 2008

Merry Monday! …Dealing with grown folks

Category: Thoughts — chuckie @ 3:07 am

Did we just blink and the weekend is now over? Say it ain’t so. Well, as we say here on the Train, seeing the glass as half full instead of half empty, “MERRY MONDAY!”.

Well passengers, this week let’s take a look at Grown Folks…most specifically those that can be difficult, especially at work. This week that will be our focus here on the train, not the only focus. We will of course diversify our ride along the way this week, but we will look at the workplace and difficult people.

Difficult people do exist at work. Difficult people come in every variety and no workplace is without them. How difficult a person is for us to deal with depends on to a large part I “truly” belive is due to our self-esteem, your self-confidence and our professional courage. Dealing with difficult people is easier when the person is just generally obnoxious or when the behavior affects more than one person. I find that dealing with difficult people is much tougher when they are attacking me personally or undermining my professional contribution.

Difficult people come in every conceivable variety. Some talk constantly and never listen. Others must always have the last word. Some coworkers fail to keep commitments. Others criticize anything that they did not create. Difficult coworkers compete with us for power, privilege and the spotlight; some go way too far in courting the boss’s positive opinion – to our diminishment.

Some coworkers attempt to undermine you and you constantly feel as if you need to watch your back. Difficult people and situations exist in every work place. There is simply no running away, trust me, I tried that earlier on in my career. one thing is for sure though, they all have one thing in common. You must address them. No matter the type of difficult situation in which we find ourselves, dealing with difficult people or situations is a must.

Well, now that we have identified what we must do, tomorrow on the ride, the LiFeTrain ride, we will look at why we have to deal with the situation. So spread the word, dealing with difficult people is being discussed on the train this week. I hope you will share your thoughts and opinions on this subject as we journey down the track this week. And hey, put a smile on your face, utter our Monday buzzwords “Merry Monday!”, look that difficult situation in the face to day and smile knowing that you are empowering yourslef this week on the train, The LiFeTrain!

All Aboard! The LiFeTrain …

February 23, 2008

Prayer Request: MY Family…Our Matriarch

Category: Thoughts — chuckie @ 9:50 am

Hey Passengers…At this very moment our Matriarch, Alean Daniel, 93 years young is undergoing major surgery.  Please pray for her and the Daniel family.  My cousin, who is like my brother, Harry Jr. and I both were agreed  that we are unusually calm because our grandmother is the most Godly and Holy woman we know.  We agreed that no matter what…our grandmother will be just fine!   We thank God that she knows Jesus…and introduced us to him as well.

Thanks in advance!

February 21, 2008

Help Me Lord…Always…

Category: Thoughts — chuckie @ 6:11 am

Hey passengers….Wazzzzup? I am on my second double shot latte this morning and my brain is a buzzing. Today I’m wondering do you find, as I do, that we can always report the feeling of divine help and strength when we come close to our breaking point? Well, I’ve concluded that divine help is always there, but I am usually so busy doing things in my own little way that I only look for it when I face absolute defeat.

Well, here’s my new belief. The tranquil nature of enlightened souls comes from our ability to take God’s help constantly. I now subscribe to this…A state of true surrender to his will for my life will lead to the feeling of victory in everything I do.

Today let’s surrender…today let’s realize Victory…

All Aboard…”The LiFeTrain!”

A Motivating Moment…4 u, 4 us, 4 2day…

Category: Thoughts — chuckie @ 1:20 am

The past is history, so let it go. The future is a mystery, so let it come. The present is this moment now – a gift. To be truly in the present today, it is useful to release all your fears (based on the past) and your worries (imagined futures) – this is the work of someone who truly wants to awaken, and break free from the anchors and burdens of dead yesterdays and speculative tomorrows. It begins simply – with awareness. See your fears, see your worries, look at them in the face, watch them come and go. Treat them like your children on their way out to play. Let them go. Be here now they say, easier said than done, I hear you say. But no one can stop us, except for ourselves. There is only now – even if you are in planning mode, stay in the present as you plan tomorrow, it’s when we drift into tomorrow with our imagination that we succumb to a lazy avoidance of this moment.

February 20, 2008

Mid-week Service…

Category: Thoughts — chuckie @ 12:48 am

Come on by the Church…The Deacon has been blessed by God to have the doors open once again!

February 19, 2008

Do You Really Have The Time?

Category: Thoughts — chuckie @ 12:16 am

A woman who lost her husband of 40 years to a sudden heart attack said that the resulting grief had caused her to value love more. When she heard couples arguing, she sometimes spoke to them, saying, “You don’t have time for this.” She noted that the wasted moments in all our lives become more precious when they cannot be
repeated.

Grief changes our perspective on life. It is trite but true that how we deal with sorrow will make us either bitter or better. In a remarkable statement, the psalmist actually thanked God for a difficult experience: “Before I was afflicted I went
astray, but now I keep Your word. . . . It is good for me that I have been afflicted, that I may learn Your statutes” (Ps. 119:67,71).

We don’t know the nature of the psalmist’s affliction, but the positive outcome was longing to obey the Lord and a hunger for His Word. Rarely can we use this truth to comfort those who hurt. Instead, it is the Lord’s word to us from His
compassionate heart and the touch from His healing hand. When we grieve, it feels more like dying than growing. But as God wraps His loving arms around us, we have the assurance of His faithful care.

had a squabble with a loved one? Why not try to patch it up today…remember, tick, tock, tick, tock…

All Aboard…”The LiFeTrain”

February 14, 2008

Happy Valentine’s Day…From Chuckie

Category: Thoughts — chuckie @ 12:56 am

I wanted to take a moment to write this Valentine’s day wish to my many sisters and friends. You will read this and know it was for you.

Thank you for your love and kindness. Thank you for listening. Thank you for allowing me to be weak when I needed to be and for allowing me to the man when I thought I could be. Thank you for restoring my faith in godly women. Thank you for allowing me to see that good women do exist.

I want you “all” to read this and know that I love you. Unfortunately, sometimes the best I can do is write these truths publically from my heart and hope that you will continue to love me…even if you have to sometimes do it from across the street.

I can’t even front, a broken heart can mend and mine will do so in God’s time… It has nothing to do with you. You are wondrous and beautifully made. At this time you deserve much more and better than me and for some of you, my cherished female friends, you deserve much better than him.

As for me, I am SO excited because I now know that someday I will be whole…and I will be complete in the Lord and be the man he has meant for me to be. I am getting stronger each and every day. My smile is back, I stand up straight…

I can only brag about two things, I am born again(blood of Jesus)…and I can give the best hug you’ve ever experienced. So sit back, receive this (hug)…and be my Valentine today and forever more…

Love always…