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Posted in Thoughts

Make this an autumn of self-kindness.

All Aboard!  As I help you up onto the train today I give you a business card (white with black raised lettering)  It reads:

 

Take care of yourself.

 

I’d like to simply share two of the most powerful and useful tips that have helped me to take care of myself in the past few years.  I hope they will help you to make this an autumn of self-kindness.


Stay away from the grey zone.

When you get stuck in thinking and worrying about your job when you are at home or your private life then you are stuck in the grey zone.

Mental rest required…

And as you may have noticed in your own life, it can be a very destructive mental habit. It robs you of so much energy and creates huge amounts of stress and worries. It can leave you so unfocused that you cannot do your work well or spend quality time – time when you are mentally 100% there – with the people closest to you.

I have had quite a bit of trouble with this in the past and what works best for me to stay out of this mental zone is to set up very firm limits.  To take a 15-minute break for every 45 minutes that I work. To not work after 7 o’clock in the evenings. To keep my weekends workfree and disconnected.  It is not easy in the beginning and if you’re like me you’ll slip during those first weeks.  But, after a while, it becomes easier and easier to keep these areas and your thoughts about them separate and to keep your attention and energy focused in the right place.

 

Be your own best friend when you stumble.

Take time for you…

When you make a mistake, fail or stumble in life then it is so easy to start beating yourself up.  When that happens this fall, promise yourself to not fall back into this old and destructive habit.  Instead, take care of yourself by asking yourself: How would my best friend/parent support me and help me in this situation?

Then do things and talk to yourself like he or she would.  This simple habit can keep you from falling into a pit of despair and it helps you to be more constructive after the first initial pain of a mistake or failure starts to dissipate.

Hey passengers have a self-kind week!

All ABoard!   The LifeTrain!

Posted in Thoughts

SIMPLIFY!

Welcome back aboard Passengers. as I’m helping you up onto the train I’m also giving you a white business card with raised black lettering.  It reads:

“When I die, I don’t want to be remembered as a know it all but, rather a share it all.

 

Today I’m sharing about a spot where I have been stuck in.  And that is in planning and in trying to create the perfect and super-polished plan to reach my goal quickly as I could and not risk any failure or setbacks.  In this case my online shopping mall.  I want to be a little AMAZON.  I thought it sounded like a smart approach.  But here’s the thing: it works a lot better in theory than in real life.  So I’ve moved away from that approach that I was so fond of during much of my professional life.

Now, it might feel like a perfect plan is the right way to go about things.  But, in my experience at least, it’s better to just focus on coming up with a simple and good plan and then to start executing it one small step at a time.

Why?

Keep it simply…

Well, because the perfect plan that is polished and polished and revised tends to just lead to weeks or months – or in my own experience sometimes years – of continued planning and of not going anywhere when it comes to actually taking action.  Also, as your plan is confronted with reality you’ll realize that things will never be or go just as you had seen them in your head before you got started. Such is life and that’s OK because you can adjust and adapt your plan along the way anyway.

So if you’re working on the perfect plan for making a change in your life – or have a tendency towards that – then simplify.

Think things through and don’t take unnecessary risks. But at the same time keep things simple and aim for just a good plan.  Break that plan down

That’s the plan…

into small or very small action-steps. And then get started with the first one as soon as you can.  This change in thinking has made a big difference in my own life.

Without making it and focusing on good plans – or sometimes honestly just OK plans – that I actually took action on rather than perfect ones that stayed daydreams I would likely not have JUST launched the sell of my TEEs and things.

Take care and have a simpler week ahead!

By the way, send me your email address in IM here and I will send you a list of my current offerings with prices.  Also, you’ll be entered for a chance to win a FREE LifeTrain Tee shirt.

All Aboard!  The LifeTrain!!!

Posted in Thoughts

Women are made to be Loved…

Welcome Passengers!  Thanks for hoping aboard today!

I’ve made a discovery!  Took me long enough.  Women are different than men in many ways, and that is a good thing. Each gender has been provided with traits that are important for necessary tasks to be completed. Together, men and

Believe in Love…

women are equally gifted and can work in tandem to create marvelous things. Men do not always understand women, and women do not always understand men. A man’s mind and body do work differently than those of a woman. It is important for each one to respect what talents are offered and to encourage one another to develop his/her own positive traits. Understanding and appreciation are important elements to apply in any given situation where men and women are working together. So, value one another and embrace “la difference!”

Thank God for the WOMAN!

All Aboard, The LifeTrain!

Posted in Thoughts

Fall Down Seven Times, Stand up Eight!

Hey Passengers, Welcome back!

let’s have some real talk about something we’ve all experienced and will again, SETBACKS!

When you have a setback it’s easy to start doubting yourself and what you do. To believe that this current setback is something that will simply become your new normal.  It’s easy to make it very personal and to start seeing yourself as the failure because of what happened.

Dark CLoud of Self-Pity…

This is a destructive way of looking at things that can drag you down and get you stuck under a dark cloud of self-pity.

So I’ve learned to look at it this way instead:

A setback is something that sometimes happens. It can be helpful and it’s just temporary.  Now, here’s how I usually break that down into three steps.

1. A sobering reminder.

Take a few deep breaths to calm down and then remind yourself: You’re not a failure just because you failed.  Setbacks happen to everyone that take chances. It’s simply a part of living life fully.  Sometimes things go well and sometimes they don’t. So don’t make a failure into this huge thing or into your identity.

2. Get something helpful out of it.

Ask yourself: what is one thing I can learn from this setback?  Use the mistake, stumble or setback to your advantage as you go forward.

3. Get going in some small way to make it temporary to yourself.

GET GOING!

I know it’s tempting to sit still and feel sorry for yourself, to beat yourself up or to just do nothing.  I’ve done it more times than I can count.  But I’ve also found that the best way to convince myself that this setback is just temporary is to start moving again.

So I take one small step forward. Or I take what I can learn from what happened and make a small action-plan that I can use to avoid making the same mistake again.

Just taking one or a few small steps might not sound like much.  But it can work wonders for your optimism and confidence.

That’s at least been my experience.

All Aboard, The LifeTrain!!!

 

Posted in Thoughts

“The Best Things In Life Are Free” True?

ALL ABOARD!!!

Welcome Passengers, welcome aboard the LifeTrain.  As I help you up into the train off the Platform I hand you your free boarding pass and a greeting card.  It simply says:

“The best things in life are free!”

This post serves to confirm Isabella Scorupco’s quote that the simplest things bring the most happiness. What brings happiness to your heart? The acquisition of

Truly…

material things will never bring you true happiness. The more you get,  the more you want, and the more responsibility you will have to maintain that materialistic life style. You will ultimately be totally disillusioned. What does bring happiness you ask in bewilderment? The answer is simple – a smile from a co-worker, a hug from a friend, a call from a family member, and/or an evening shared with a loved one. Human dignity, respect, and compassion are all reflected in these most genuine, simple acts of kindness. What is your state of mind right now? You can be happy if you choose to be. Look around you more closely to find the ordinary, everyday happy moments!

So I’m designating this day as Choose-day, not Tuesday.  Choose to be happy for the best things in life are free.

All Aboard!  The LifeTrain!

Posted in Thoughts

Positive thoughts…Positive Life!

Hey Passengers Welcome aboard!  As I help you up I give you the usual business welcome card.  It reads:

Positive Thoughts! Happy Life!

Do something wonderful today, people may imitate it.

Many times we cannot control the circumstances in our life, but we can control our reaction to them. Are you a pessimist or an optimist type of person? Your answer will help determine the quality

of your life, as the “quality of your life is dependent upon the quality of your thoughts.” Keep a positive attitude, and you will find your life easier to bear. There is always room for improvement in our mental attitude. It takes effort and determination to turn life around from negative to positive, but it can be done. Prove it is so in your own life!

All Aboard!  The LifeTrain

Posted in Thoughts

Happy Memorial Day weekend…

Welcome passengers!  Welcome aboard!  I hope you are enjoying your holiday weekend!

You know, I bet you have experienced great moments of happiness and sadness in your own life. What made the difference? Not the situation or circumstances – you did! You are as happy as you choose, or as sad as you allow the circumstances to ruin your day. You cannot buy happiness over the counter in a drug store as prescribed medicine. How do you tap into the source of happiness that will never run dry?One way is to use all your God-given talents to do your very best, even in the smallest acts. You will feel great to know that you gave it “your all!” Remember, sadness is contagious, so is happiness. So “decide” to be happy, and you will see changes.  How about it?

All board, The LifeTrain!!!

Posted in Thoughts

A LifeTrain “Mirror” moment…

Hey Passengers, periodically I “SERIOUSLY” have to look into the mirror.  Today I did a little self-talk into the proverbial mirror.  Ease drop for a few, here you go:

Mr. Conductor…Your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.

Do not put limits on yourself; others will do that for you. Fight your inner “prison,” and break

Positive Self-talk

through those barriers – real or imagined – to attain the success that is deep within you. Success should not be determined by material things that are shallow and can easily pass away. Your success should be defined by the meaningful goals that you have achieved in life – a satisfying career, a lasting relationship, making a difference in your community, helping others, etc. These are the things that will gladden your soul and have lasting value. Be strong; stay focused on the important things. Maintain hope, and practice resolute willpower. This will be tough to do but very worthwhile in the end!

End of mirror moment…

All Aboard!  The LifeTraian

Posted in Thoughts

Don’t Let Last Week Use Up Too Much Of This Week…

…and “Don’t let yesterday use up too much of today.”

 

Hey Passengers age is a funny thing, isn’t it? It’s both an internal and external measurement by which many of us, consciously or not, judge our successes and failures, and how we are often judged by others: “she’s so young to be CEO;” “he’s too old to be a quarterback now;” “those guys should have stopped touring years ago;” “how old is that woman he’s dating?”

Measurement is part of our culture.

LIVE | LEARN | LEAVE

Paradoxically, the paths most of us initially choose for our lives usually happen at times when we are the least prepared to understand the significance of our decisions.

It took me until I reached “mid-life” while, simultaneously, hitting rock bottom to finally change the course of my life and, most importantly, to learn how to let go of the “whys,”  “what ifs,” and “if only” that had become my everyday mantras for a while.

It’s not easy to put your past in perspective and ignore cultural measurements, and it can be unnerving to allow yourself the time and space to evolve, but from my experience the mistakes, bad choices, and seemingly insurmountable challenges you may now be facing are truly fixable.

And once you decide you’re ready, you’ll find that it’s cathartic (and, yes, a little frightening) to give yourself some time to find your true path—however you define that for yourself.

The quote in the beginning says not to let yesterday take up too much of today, it doesn’t say: “don’t ever look back.”

I believe that while “never” looking back is a noble goal, it is very difficult for many people to do—especially me—without the kind of awareness that comes only from distance. So I chose a quote that, for me, was accessible, allowing me the space to safely pause and reflect, and then inspiring me to act when I was ready. You, too, will find the right words for you, if you haven’t already.yard

It took many years, a traumatic event, and a couple of near death experiences for me to, essentially, start my life over. And still it was difficult and I was afraid when I made that decision; change is scary regardless of it being “right.”

The simplest realization that “Change Happens” regardless, helped me gain clarity and perspective, and then time gave me the confidence and courage to act. And remember cultural measurement? I measure myself differently now, and I actively learn from people of all ages.

This is my story so far. I encourage you to find your inspiration and motivation to help you on your journey and then perhaps you’ll share your story.

Most importantly, you need to know—not just “believe”—there is a right time for you to change, no matter how hard, no matter your age, no matter the obstacles. If you feel in your heart that you are not where you want to be it is never too late. Be your own light; the universe will wait for you.

All Aboard!  The LifeTrain!!!

 

Posted in Thoughts
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